Jane Doe or should I say- John Doe

I always tell myself and everyone else that my special person, my soulmate is not out there. I thought I had found that person already and it turns out I was wrong. I know I am young still and I still have a lot of time to find "the one", but I have goals/plans. I want to get married and have kids by the time I am 21. I don't want to move out soon and have to live alone. I mean I can't really sleep next to people, but I at least want the experience of sleeping next to someone special. But I am now straying from what I originally wanted to say.
I am writing to the person who will someday come and save me from loneliness. Now, I do not know who this person is yet, but I hope I will someday. So here goes...
Dear John Doe,
I have been waiting for you for some time now. Why have you eluded me for so long? I think about you all of the time. Like what you might look like, what you smell like; I think of what your personality is like. I wonder, do we fit together perfectly like pieces of a puzzle? Just so you know, I do have flaws, but who doesn't? I say that the best people have a ton of flaws, and they aren't afraid to admit it. I hope you are my dream guy times 10, but that doesn't really mean anything since my dream guy is an ever changing man. I have fucked up so many times in relationships and most of the time I don't even know what I did wrong, so if you could please always tell me when I am doing something wrong I would greatly appreciate it. You know, I really feel like I could be a good...no great girlfriend if someone would just give me a chance. Hopefully that someone would be you. I love like it's the last thing I will ever do. I have so much passion about romance and love that it's crasi. I may say all this stuff about never finding someone, but in all actuality I know that my special someone is out there and he is looking for me. Oh well this letter is just so off track lol but I like being able to type this all out. So as I was saying, I am a hopeless romantic. I love reading romance novels, not for all of the sex but for the raw passion that they feel for each other. I want someone to look at me and now I am the one. I don't want them to be shy about it I just want them to go for it, but I sometimes doubt that I will meet someone like that. I want a gentleman who will hold doors open for me, pull out my chair so I can sit down, take me out on a date! It's sad I have had plenty of boyfriends and only one ever took me on a date. I have been on 2 dates since I started dating, or should I say since I started having boyfriends. I am tired of little boys; I want a man or maybe a young man lol I want someone who has their shit together, who knows what he wants in life. I just want someone who will love me and mean it.
I have changed and grown up so much, and I am hoping since I am becoming a better person that maybe good things will come my way, like a guy lol